Saturday, November 29, 2014

10am- Breakfast: sausage, oatmeal, 2 clementines

feelings:  I felt pretty satisfied with this meal, but I wanted to continue to eat.  I had half of the oatmeal still left, and didn't want THAT, so I safely assumed that the reason that I wanted to keep eating wasn't hunger.  The clementines are perfection right now.  There are 10 left, so I will probably eat more later.  I cooked the sausage and the oats on the stove, which made this feel more special than my usual breakfasts.

1pm- Lunch: Turkey, green bean casserole, cranberry sauce

feelings: Some of the last of the Thanksgiving meal leftovers!  I love this kind of food.  I wonder why there are so many foods that I really only allow myself to enjoy once a year.  I almost never eat these foods outside of Thankgiving and Christmas, even though I love them a lot.  I wonder if I could eat chips or pizza semi-annually some day?  I wish that I didn't love those foods so much...  Anyway, this was a good meal, but I feel a little stuffed.  I think that I ate too quickly and also probably too soon after breakfast. It's hard to not constantly eat when I'm home alone.  Why is that?  Too much closet eating since Mom died?  I think that may be it.  Just a habit now.

3pm- Snack: bread and peanut butter, followed shortly by 1oz baggie of chips

feelings: This wasn't a binge, but I wasn't actually hungry.  I just desired to be FULL.  I wanted to eat until I was slightly uncomfortable.  I don't know why.  I do feel kind of inadequate and useless today, because it's my third day off in a row and the house is still a mess.  I find myself wanting even more food an hour later, but I'm going to drink some water since I haven't had any yet, and I doubt that I'm actually hungry.

4:30pm- Snack: granola bar and yogurt

feelings: I was not hungry.  I feel shitty for continuing to eat knowing that it's not in response to hunger.  It's because I'm bored, and procrastinating housework.  It's after 5 now, and I need to clean the kitchen, the bathroom, and the dining room before I go to bed.  Really, those three rooms will take like an hour to clean, so why am I putting it off?  Sigh.  I also need to shower.  I'm hoping that soon I will get up, do my housework then shower.

7:00pm- Snack: popcorn

feelings:  I finished my housework and ate the popcorn while watching Netflix.  I was hungry and probably should have  had an actual meal instead of popcorn.  Ate to satisfaction.  Feeling happy with this food choice.

8:45pm- Dinner: chicken alfredo

feelings:  Full.  I think that I ate too much today.  Feeling a bit guilty.  Wanting to make food rules for myself, wanting to diet, wanting to get back on My Fitness Pal and plan a week of meals.  Must resist these dieting thoughts.  Or not.  A few food rules wouldn't be the end of the world...

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